Thursday 3 January 2013

The Music in Me

You are invited to accompany me on a personal odyssey - one that on some levels I have done frequently - this account involves - the first but not likely the last of its kind for the New Year (2013). Having said that generally no two journey's are entirely alike. As I have said I openly welcome your company though I will say at the outset, that I can't really guarantee you will "go" anywhere, or that you will go where I am going or even believe that it's possible that anyone can or is, going anywhere. Perhaps the portal created by my musings will invite a similar journey for you, maybe we will begin together and arrive a a cross-road where we will be called in opposite directions. Equally possible, you may think this the psychotic rambling fabrication, induced by one too many (did I say one?) shortbread cookies - it matters not. As writer, editor & publisher, I pitched the story and have been given the green light, "go ahead" said I, "run the story." Great I'll ensure the shortbread is delivered to the agreed upon location! (But I do digress) So, the journey I refer to is that which I invariably take when listening to the sound track from the movie "August Rush." That music for me is soul candy - it is shamanic healing journey, creative portal and muse combined. In the overture the voice of the main character - (a young boy) says, "sometimes the world tries to knock it out of you!"Before I venture to share further with regard to "it"- I suppose it's worth mentioning that the character in the movie is "orphaned," though not specifically my reality, I was adopted as a baby. So perhaps there are elements of this story that resonate for me where others might only see it as a variation of "Oliver Twist." He continues on further during the overture that, "I believe in music the way some people believe in fairy tales - that what he "hears" is the same thing his mother & father heard, that the notes he hears are the same notes they heard that brought them together""Maybe that's how they find me?" (he concludes) I am not holding out for this to be the road-map to locating my parents (in fact I have been reunited with many from my mother's side of the family - though she had passed by that time). But what of this music he describes that which drew his parents together (that drew my parents together) long enough for conception to occur - who says the lyrics were to include they stay together the rest of their natural lives? To return to "it," I choose to believe that which "the world attempts to knock out of you" is the call of your soul, the music nothing less, than the "voice" of the Divine. This sometimes happens by "loving" parents that believe the best interest is being served,when their child "gets a real job," passion being seen like a nursery rhyme maxim. "It" can be so deeply lost beneath the layers of conditioning,the wounds of conformity, even destroyed by those that are so afraid, because they don't hear or understand the soul song of another. I did say we're going on a journey! I can't begin to tell you how many times I have heard this entire sound track, even still at times there are tracks within that move me to tears and some of these are instrumental. See the thing is, I invite you to listen to "it" but you may not hear "it," at all. To me the arrangements, the energy, the resonance and yes some of the lyrics take me somewhere. There has always been music in my life - my father a musician in a military band, "music lessons" for my adopted sister and myself. There is music that was playing during my childhood that I remember note for note to this day. I play a little guitar and sing some (and this is not false modesty) it reflects what I believe to be true, even though I get relatively widespread positive feedback. So even if the music from that movie might not gain "critical acclaim" from some more widely trained or experienced to assess it through widely accepted criteria - "it" is sonically and viscerally perfect to me. I welcome your company on this journey, I will hear the truth of your experience - nothing can detract from this being "it" (or a part there of) for me. I can't tell you if this is "it" speaking to me through the music nor tell you that the music is "it" for you. All I know is most of my life I've been searching for "it" (largely outside of myself). To embrace divine order and timing I conclude that I have been led by the "music" upon the "Long and Winding Road" to the place and time where I begin to know "it" for myself. Perhaps now, writing becomes the vehicle through which I express "it." There has been pain and sadness as part of my story that has obscured "it." When I touch "it" or "it" me - I know that a connection deeply personal, profound & loving is occurring. I pray that each is ably to find "it" and express "it" in their unique and perfect way,and that the day will come when no longer does anyone feel it necessary or acceptable to "knock 'it' out of anyone!"

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